Some people call it balance. But I like to call it the middle. The Center.
Because "balance" doesn't quite capture it, and sometimes people use the word "balance" as a way to beat themselves up — a standard to measure themselves against. (i.e. - "I'm not balanced enough!")
And I'm not interested in more of that.
Life, for many, is a game of extremes. And it can feel that way to ALL OF US from time to time. We're either high or we're low… high, or we're low. This is not reserved just for manic depression, most everybody does this on some level.
We're terrified of that middle ground. We avoid it like the black plague. We're afraid to find out what's there.
We tell ourselves it's "boring", and "mundane", and "lackluster". We'd rather be happy-happy, we'd even rather be SAD. Most people would rather be down in the dumps than in that middle ground.
But oh, sweet middle-ground, it's so misunderstood.
As a former lover of extremes, I know of what I speak. But I have come to love this soft and open middle-ground, because I have discovered that's where grace IS. That's where freedom IS. The middle is where Love lives, just like the heart of you…
at the Center.
The great secret that I have discovered is that extremes are very limited, they're boxed-way-in. But the middle place is Oh-So-OPEN.
It is soft and sweet and ALL-ENCOMPASSING.
I love all of the seasons of this earth, but I have always adored Fall and Spring for their soft in-betweenness. Summer and Winter are the more extreme polarities of this planets expression, and though they both come with incredible gifts and joys, they often end up keeping us boxed-indoors with their extremes of heat and/or cold. Whereas Fall and Spring are more mild, less driven to extremes… which translates to a feeling of greater comfort, tolerance, and acceptance of all things.
Fall and Spring hold space between extremes.
They are roomier, more of a seemingly "safe" place to be — for prolonged periods of time, anyway. Do you think the same is not true of you? of us? By inhabiting the middle-ground, we too become of greater comfort, tolerance and acceptance to all things. Because we are WITH the very PRESENCE that allows us to give that love and acceptance to ourselves. In reality, it is more accurate to say that you don't "give it to yourself" - you just are it, when you are in this space.
The middle is where you get to find out that you're not separate. Extremes REQUIRE separation.
In order to feel flying-high-happy, you have to cut-off sadness completely. In order to feel totally down-in-the-dumps you have to cut-off happy completely. You have to separate yourself out from the WHOLE OF LIFE.
When you're in the "happy", it seems so fulfilling, you think that's all you'll ever need if you could just maintain it! But love, I hate to burst your bubble… but you cannot and you will not, EVER maintain that. This is not a flaw with you, no no. This is just a reminder that NOTHING (I repeat - NOTHING) in this life is constant.
NOTHING in this life is FOREVER. Not in THIS life.
Who you are, beyond this life, beyond the form of your body and your personality and this world… THAT is FOREVER. But in THIS world? nope, not even close. And in trying to maintain that, you cut off pieces of the whole of you — the whole of LIFE.
And my love, you ARE life.
The middle ground invites all extremes, all opposites, all the polarities of life, and blends into a state-of-grey that you have NEVER seen with your eyes. It is the space that holds EVERYTHING.
This is where true Joy lives. This is where unconditional Love meets the well of your arms, and you wrap this world up in your giving.
This is where life is always waiting for you.
When you're done playing in the sand-box of extremes, it welcomes you home. It does not mind if you play… play away! It does not mind if you mess around in polarities, it loves it! But it is always there, awaiting your home coming, fixing you a piping hot plate of dinner, turning on the porch light at dusk, and waiting in the window for your darling face to return.
Isn't she the sweetest?
Let's give our mama-middle some love.